Dream on standby

We walked together into town
Looked up and we smiled
We were here to make a name
Our number will be dialled

The giant boards would hoard the name
And screens would alight
My tales, my vision, my legend
Would take centre stage
My dreams, with you I’d take flight

Meant to be or not, it didn’t really matter.
Our will would be spoken
This was recipe of talent and sincerity
And grit that couldn’t be broken

But here I stand, alone, without you
Hailing my next pay day
I’ve found something else, I said to you
I had changed my play

The twinkles’s gone,
And like an old song
I’ve traded you away

Maybe people were right,
when they saw my light.
That time kills all in its way

Together we had walked into town
Looked up and we smiled
We were here to make a name
Our number was to be dialled

Let me tell you once and for all
Forever I have not left you
Tomorrow, day after, maybe not
But I will come back for you

Oh trust me, dear dream
No matter how hollow it may seem.
But I’ve learnt a thing or two.

No matter who I am or what I become,
I will come back for you.

Head on my shoulder

The head on my shoulder is obviously mine,
It’s facing some problems, because nothing is fine.

Hounded by work and inhibitions alike.
Pushing me into a hole. Provoking me to strike.

But then her head on my shoulder. Deeply exhales.
Puffs down the boulders. And, peace prevails.

She wraps her arms around and holds on tight,
She makes no sound, and the day turns out all right.

How long will I survive with my head? I really know not.
But, with her head, I believe in me again.
I believe in life, a lot!

Grey

The skies
Turn grey,
Reminiscent
Of all that’s fray.
As if humbling us
To say,
This isn’t your day,
Dear soul,
This isn’t your day.

Light has deserted you.
Night has come early.
You may try to shine with all your might,
But will succumb out of glory’s sight.

You may paint your world,
In hues of blue and red,
White and green,
Or orange instead.
Like a filter,
The clouds shall dawn,
And bleed those hues,
Into a shade of its own.

Until your pour,
Down to the ground,
The grey won’t leave you.
Until you rain,
Over all that you own,
This day won’t leave you.

The skies
Turn grey,
And you must adhere.
Sometimes, it’s just one of those days,
When you must live your fear.

Today Comes Again.

And once again
Today comes again
To tell me
Your tea is an excuse
Your ears are numb
Your words are claw marks

Once again
I drop a few years
And relive a fear
A dream
Written off
Before ever being written

The patchwork still shows
When the food of my soul
Finds a stage

The days
Of a spotlight so strong
Through which I see
With utmost clarity

Peering into darkness
In front of me
I tremble
No more

Now I fluttering
In a chair
Twitch my toes
Word this visceral clutter

Can I
Will I
Can I please?

No.

Tea is getting cold
The shadow hangs strong

I must get back
Leaving a note

The last tear
The very last
I will now know its purpose

And today is the day
When a lifetime begins
To wait for it

that’s what i do

I pen words to free myself.
To give me shelter.
To say how I feel.
To make myself feel.
Writing makes me stronger.
Makes me feel lighter.
I write to stand up for something.
To let go of something.
To make a rhyme.
To withdraw shadows.
To send a tear.
To seek warmth in flames.
To coin a moment.

 

And finally,
I write,
to never be written off.

Prayer

I saw someone pray today
It was beautiful
It was enlightening
It was honest
It was kind

It made me want to do good
It asked me to be nice
It pushed me to work harder
It found me in a better light

I saw someone pray today
With no words
With no folded hands
Only honest eyes
And a child-like smile

Today, I became a believer

Intolerance

It’s rare
For me
To sit
And pen
Or talk
Words
That say
What I feel
About you
About us
About everything

In words
That seem fair
Logical
Appear unbiased
Look devoid of ulterior motives
Words
That I speak
Come
From my heart
And nothing more

So
Here I say
Once
And for all
I write
Not too often
Not too well
But when I do
It’s from the heart
So
Before you say
Feel
Or interpret
My arrogance
My anger
My audacity
My stupidity
My insensitivity
I request you
To look back
Think back
Do these words
Really describe me

Because if they haven’t
In all these years
Months
Days
Then don’t think
For one second
That they do
Now
Or ever will

This isn’t a proclamation
You may call it
Sensitisation
If you just
Wait
For the right words
Wait
For me to un-fumble
You will see
That my words
Aren’t me
And I
Am more
Much much more
Than the words
That you’ve read
Written
Heard
Understood

I am
A man in transition
Growing up
Smartening up
Shedding
Some stupidity
Throwing away
Some insecurity

I am
Just like you

The Other Guy

Is he smart?
Is he funny?

From the shadows,
I fail to see,
This other guy,
Who completes my stories for me.

Casting endings that I hate,
Leaving behind a blundered state,
A twisted fate,
Where my story is always a tad late.

He tells strange truths to those I love
Sometimes before I arrive,
Sometimes as I stand.

He’s just right,
Grappling my fate tight,
Seeming always better,
Yet somehow alike,

Ruining my day,
Throwing me into a fray,
Setting alight my dreams,
Intentionally, it seems.

Turning my world on his head,
A righteous turn he’d sometimes lend.
I wonder from time to time,
Is he a rival, or an unlikely friend?

For now, I fight,
As he offers just one deal.
A happily ever after,
To forever steal.

Aye Dost

Aye dost, aye saathi,
Hum badal gaye.
Hum badh gaye,

Jab zindagi muddi meri,
Tu bhi mudd gaya,
Sang mere,
Tu bhi badal gaya,

Zindagi jab lagi mehengi,
Yaad aayi baatein teri,
Thaam ke unn yaadon ka haath,
Khud ke maarta hun bum pe laath.

Par phir hogi yun mulaqaat,
Jab kategi yeh duniya daari ki raat.

Smile

Can I borrow a smile today?
I have a difficult road to take,
Many a webs to shake,
Some dreams to meet,
New languages to speak.

For once I find the strength,
And the will to walk on,
I shall return your smile to the world,
Everyday, from night to dawn.

Don’t Answer. Ask!

What are you doing here? Got nothing to do? No errands? No friends to meet?
If no, here’s a quick question.
If you forgot how old you are, what would you like to do?

Don’t worry about the answer, because there are plenty. And it will keep changing. Here’s where I’m attempting to make sense – when we ask ourselves the questions that matter, we find a lot more than just the answers. Discovering yourself is a long process, so don’t hurry it. It’ll happen. You don’t want to end up finding someone you don’t really like.

We do many things for many reasons. We work hard, party hard, and even worry hard. Little things can help us out. Little things like questions can help streamline it, enrich it, and make it more enjoyable.

For example, instead of saying “sorry mom, I know it’s been over a week since we spoke.” Ask “so mom, what did you with all the free time?” While this is a question that you have posed to your mom, it’s also posed at you. It is so, because you will get an opportunity to learn something more about your mom, and you will be a catalyst in helping her thinking about newer things to do in your absence. We’d all like our moms to get busy right? Else they’ll just worry.

Life will give you many opportunities to throw long statements with facts, figures, and philosophies, but are you really making a difference? To your own life first.

Earlier this year, I asked myself – Am I ready for a promotion? My boss thinks so. But, do I need the added responsibility? I’ll surely get more money. But, is the money the problem in my life? Is it not he independence to do more things like writing this blog, going to party more friends, writing a book (that has still not started), maybe joining a theatre group, etc. I refused the offer. And I stand by it.

Instead of saying that I miss playing badminton, I asked “Have I quit playing badminton?” It hasn’t been too long, but I’ve started playing again. Asking helped.

Questions work like deep breathing. They give peace, stability, and the strength to move on.

More examples?
Why do I need to famous at a young age? Do I plan on being useless after 40?
If my friend said something harsh, did it hurt him/her as much as it hurt me?
Am I really incapable of making any concrete change to the world’s hunger/poverty issue?

Don’t be in a hurry to answer. Let the question take you, to you.

Don’t Answer. Ask!

Flight of the Albatross

An albatross he was
That flew across the endless skies
He learnt tales of heroes and demons
Of truth, and righteous lies

For days, the sun had shone with all its might,
Leaving him to retreat to the sea in sight.
Across the water he glided,
Soon in her every story, he sided.

Mesmerised by her kind ways,
He rejoiced in the poetic days that had no end.
She returned him to his lost dreams and grace,
In her eyes, a smile he’d find on his face.

Slowly, he found a meaning in his life’s pause,
To become a bird with a mighty cause

One night, a storm brew,
In it the sea rejoiced and broke away from its brim.
She met the albatross in the sky,
And they kissed their first swim

In her innocent eyes,
The skies seemed smaller even in its grandest size
In her soft touch he felt,
A new heart, that slowly began to melt.

The storm disappeared,
And left behind the bird, and the sea with silent cries
He remembered the tales of heroes and demons
Of truths, and righteous lies

So, as the sea turned estrange,
Both began to drown to fray.
To not be an albatross to his once dear friend,
With broken wings, to never return, he flew away.